Ruthless Sequence

Well, it's that time again--when the Meinders side of the family gets together for food, conversation, and board games. The favorite is still Sequence, and I must say there was an abundance of energy going around the table tonight. I had an able, quality partner in Kaitlyn, but we just weren't getting the cards. Liz and Darlene on the other hand simply crushed us. You'd think on Thanksgiving there would be some compassion. But sadly, no.

Home again

It has been a whirlwind in the last couple of weeks. Liz had her play, which was really well done and fun to watch. Then we had Alpine Holiday and all the work and fun with that event. Then I planned a quick trip to Florida with my mom and my aunt Judy to visit another aunt, Bettie, who is in hospice now with cancer. We were fortunate to have 2 full days of visiting her at her home last week. Those hours were filled with conversation, remembering, laughing, and tears. I will write more about her and about our visit later on, I think.

From a physical perspective, my pain is declaring itself more often. The latest dilantin increase was successful for a few weeks, with good overall comfort and only a couple of zaps a day. But as seems to usually happen, the best coverage wears off eventually and symptoms get worse again. I'm not in severe pain--just noticing the increase in triggers and occurrences, so that makes me just want to take some deep breaths and hold on for what might be coming.

A Thought

Finish each day and be done with it.

You have done what you could.

Some blunders and absurdities no doubt crept in;

forget them as soon as you can.

Tomorrow is a new day;

begin it well and serenely

and with too high a spirit

to be encumbered with your old nonsense.

~Ralph Waldo Emerson

Enough said!

The Tale of T-Gemmy by MariAnne

My sister and her kids have been on a Red Letter Cam(less)paign (get it?) and I love getting the mail now. Sometimes it is a word of two from the older, more literate ones, sometimes an interpreted note from the youngest, and always hand-drawn pictures. I think what they understand is that Auntie Lynn doesn't feel well right now and has to take a lot of medicine to feel better. But recently I received a truly creative effort on the part of my sister, and it's much too wonderful to keep it to myself...

The Tale of T-Gemmy

There once was a wicked person

who liked to get people a cursin'.

She climbed on inside

and made for an electrifying ride.

Bolt after bolt she sent to the face

Until she has someone crying all over the place.

"Just make it stop!" that person would say,

But T. Gemmy would keep shocking on day after day.

Medicine, acupuncture, massage, and a diet of sludge

would not make that nasty old woman even budge.

Until came along the ultimate plan.

Just hit her over the head with a frying pan!

"Of course that will work!"

"Let's get rid of the jerk!"

So out came her nemesis, T-Fal

Coated in black and ready to brawl.

T. Gemmy saw this and shouted, "Let's get it on!"

Next time I saw her she was coated in teflon.

And this my dear friends was the end of T. Gemmy.

I'd tell you some more but the victor won't lemme.

"We won't waste one minute more,"

She said, "Time to celebrate!" as we ran out the door.

As for that awful old hack

I'm sure that she'll never be back.

And this end, it is oh, so happy.

I wish it for you, and hope it is snappy!

Holding Steady Now

Last week I asked my neurologist for an increase in one of my meds to deal with the increasing pain. First, he wanted to check my levels--meaning I had to have blood drawn. I complied on Friday morning, and that afternoon, his assistant called with the results. My levels for the tegretol and gabapentin are "fine," but the dilantin was "a little low." So that day I was allowed to increase the dilantin from 300mg daily to 400. Since then, my pain has been better controlled, and that is good. It's not gone, of course. I feel it throughout the day in all the normal ways, but it's not as often and it is not as sharp or explosive. So I guess we'd say that's manageable---for now. I add that not to be pessimistic, but rather to be realistic. I've been down this road long enough to know that "manageable" lasts only for a while. How long of a while I do not know, so that brings me back to the importance of just living today and trying not to worry about what I don't know yet.

BASIC MATH

Having never been accused of loving math nor excelling in it, I find it amusing that I am now using my math skills in some volunteer work at school. Actually, I am just using my counting skills, but still, that's math, right?

Dealing with random, intermittent shocking facial pain every day gets boring in some ways. Some days are tough to deal with because there are lots of episodes of pain. Other days are better, but they all have the side effect feature--mainly the weird fatigue/drowsiness. On the harder days I have to work to be quieter or to improvise things so I can be more comfortable.

But the amount of time in a day is the same, and when I am doing so little compared to my former life as a full time social worker, it seems like a reason to get out is giving my days more purpose. So when I saw the notice of a need for help in the Gift Card office at school (a fundraising/tuition assistance program), I offered myself even though I clarified that I am not really at full capacity, it seemed like the right thing to do when the woman in charge said to me, "Well, can you count?"

Yes, that is something I can do. So there I am a couple mornings a week, counting gift cards and writing down the number on an inventory sheet. It feels a little like supported employment, but I am grateful for it for now.