When the kids were younger and more prone to complaining about going to church, I reminded them that God is only asking for one hour. Putting it into that kind of perspective made it seem more reasonable to them and certainly provided less fodder for fussing about it. Holy Week is also spring break this year, and yes, we are in church a lot. And they are NOT complaining! I think they are appreciating their faith and the opportunities to worship, which are special just because they are normal for us.
As I have started feeling better and looking forward to having a regular life again, I have noticed how much less time I am spending on my own to just be quiet, centered, prayerful. I have been feeling bad about it. When I needed so much every day to deal with the pain strikes and the difficult changes in life and the worry and anxiety and then the surgery issues, my connection to God was front and center. I reached out continually and recognized the many gifts I was being given, even in the heat of the moment (there's nothing like relief of pain even for a small period of time to incite a heartfelt and meaningful thank you). I know the connection is not gone. I am just feeling like I have to maintain a finer awareness now, to be purposeful about it since it looks like life is taking a turn back toward normalcy, and unfortunately that's got a flip side which consumes time unless I have a definite faith practice built in.
Does that make sense to anyone besides me?
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1 comment:
I completely understand, and have felt the same guilt. When we are in need, the first thing we do is find God, and ask for guidance, comfort, and support from Him. It's so easy to not be as focused when we are well. But remember that God loves us every day, in all we do, and He will be there whenever we need to talk. I think that times like you've had will continue to enrich your Faith. You will have a stronger conviction, even in good times. You are such an amazing woman!
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